Blog # 5: If I Were to Spend a Day With Anyone in History, Who Would It Be?

Blog # 5: If I Were to Spend a Day with Anyone in History, Who Would It Be? 

            History. That word can mean so many things. It can mean the great hurricane Sandy or it can mean the boreal Ice age. More often than not, it is the humans that shape history. The humans, (no doubt) are the crux that creates our history. Another fact that many individuals realize is that it tends to be the people closest to us that shape our lives. If I were to spend a day with anyone in history, who would it be? It would be the people that are closest to me. My parents.

It seems silly wanting to talk to my parents when I could talk to Albert Einstein or Harry Potter. Sure, these people are significant to society however, they are trivial to me. I would want to bring my parents from the past and spend a day with them when they were 13. It would be very interesting for numerous reasons. Firstly, it will help me to understand how they grew up to be the people they are today. Bring my teenage parents to the future would also be quite entertaining. Lastly, I would be able to see what effect ‘past’ them would have on ‘present’ them.    

My parents were two very different people. My mother was one of top mathematician in Serbia for her age category and she lived in a small town in Serbia. My father was one of the top athletes in his and many other generations as well. Unlike my mom, he lived in the biggest city in Serbia; Belgrade. My grandfather died when my father was 8 years old and after that event his childhood was difficult and ridden with uncertainty. In conversing with my young parents I would hope to find motives that drove them forward. Motives don’t always come easily. Sometimes they are found in the individual’s natural ability and other times they are found in the person’s characteristics and their interactions with other people. I would want to spend a day with my adolescent parents to see what was driving them forward to become who they have become. Maybe my mother was not always a quite person? Maybe my father was not as smart as he says he was? Who were their friends? What kind of mischief they did? How they felt about their parents at teenage age? What were their thoughts and hopes? People are always changing. These changes are what shape us throughout our lives. By observing my relatives I would have better perspective on how events impact us for the rest of our lives. How these events turn us into who we are.

Wouldn’t it be interesting to watch my parents unexpectedly meet with their younger selves?  We know that we often critique people that we do not know. It would be fascinating to watch people judge themselves with the same standards as they do for everyone else. When they judge somebody else, their reasoning are much more sharp than if it were them who were doing it. Would my parents take notice of the good characteristics they see in their younger selves or would they let the imperfections slide for they know that they were no better when they were children? They would also discover more about themselves and how they became who they are because in order to shape someone else, you should know your own history first. In addition, it would be amusing to meet my parents. They were remarkably different, nobody would have dreamed of them being married!

If I were to spend a day with my parents from their adolescent years, not only would it fulfill my curiosity, but it would also benefit me. I only confidently know one way of nurturing a family and that is the way my family raised me. When I see how they behaved then and compare to how they behave now, my development might be exceptionally different. Perhaps I will choose to discipline my children differently. This all depends on how I reflect back to my childhood.

There are many amazing people in our world (Nelson Mandela, Craig Kilberger, Mr.Samec, to name a few) but the people that we think will change or influence our lives are sometimes very different and distant from us. “Frequently, we get attached to these amazing people and attachments lead to expectations and expectations lead to disappointments.” The people that know you best are the people that have been there with you from the start. Doesn’t it make sense to be with them from start right to the end? So if I could modify the question, I’d change it to, “If I could spend every day with an amazing person, who would it be and why?

Ivan or The Lieutenant?

Ivan or The Lieutenant?

Ivan dies in the cemetery in the short story “The Cemetery Path". He doesn’t just drop dead (well, in this case he almost does), there must be a reason to why he died. Is it simply the fate or someone’s fault? Who is to be accused? In this story there are only two suspects: The Lieutenant (and friends) and Ivan, himself. In my opinion, I believe that the fault lies more within Ivan. He should have stood up for himself long before the night of his death and he shouldn't have accepted his challenge. Another reason why his  death is somewhat his own fault it because he was not thinking rationally.

Ivan’s death is partially his fault because he accepted the challenge.  In pressured situations, it is normal for the victim to step out of their comfort zones and try new things. Although in Ivan’s case, he should have known his boundaries. Of course it was not entirely Ivan’s fault. If the lieutenant had not pressured him to such lengths he would not have gone down the cemetery path in the first place. However, Ivan mindlessly accepted the challenge without thinking of the consequences beforehand. If Ivan had evaluated the situation closer, he may have found that the lieutenant does not seem as brave as he says he is. Ivan could have challenged the lieutenant before he had done it himself. If the lieutenant was not able to complete the task, he was in no position to be mocking Ivan for his fears for he shared them as well. Providing that the lieutenant was able to complete the task, it may have given Ivan more confidence while he was walking down the cemetery path.

In my opinion, the cemetery path has many conflicts. One in particular is a great example of bullying. The Lieutenant and the others at the saloon were bullying Ivan in the verbal form. After excessive bullying, he must have realized that he has to stand up to the Lieutenant. Otherwise the bullying will never stop. Ivan should have stood up much sooner then he did. The bullying has gone to the extent of his death. Another thing he could have done is stop going to the saloon. The only reason he went to the saloon is to escape his lonely house. However if the company is putting you down rather then bringing you up, then it is better to be alone then with rude individuals.

In addition, the main responsibility for Ivan’s death lies in Ivan’s hands because he killed himself with fear. Although Ivan fears the cemetery, he should have been calm and he should have tried to control his emotions. He was in such fear that he couldn't think rationally. Ivan was so afraid of the cemetery that he did not even want to look at what was tugging at him. If Ivan had walked in the cemetery with more confidence than fear, he may have been able to pay attention to what is going on around him, be more alert and he would have been able to realize that the sword was holding tails of his long coat.

When Ivan died in the cemetery, it was not only his fault. If he only thought things through, he may have still been alive. If the Lieutenant had done things differently, he may have still been alive. If Ivan had turned around, he may have still been alive. But, as the saying goes “Actions come with consequences”. Some things we don’t decide sometimes it is just fate. That is why we have to learn from our mistakes and try not to repeat them.

Perspective

Perspectives

Everybody has imperfections. Usually, the only person that sees those flaws is you. The physical imperfections are not often noticed by people around you. The qualities that are in you, are very hard for you to see, but extremely easy for others to notice. This quality is called character. I am aware that I am not perfect. Nobody is. However if I were to change some traits about myself, I would change my lack of focus, my stubborn character and my terrible temper.

I am a very stubborn person. Sometimes it’s good to be stubborn. For an example, in a cross country race, you can either let the person beside you beat you, or you don’t let them get in front of you. Often times it is not good to have that characteristic. From time to time, I start an argument for no particular reason at all. I do not concede until I have won the argument, no matter how smart or stupid are my arguments. This is something I’d change because this occasionally interrupts my everyday relationships. If I wasn't as stubborn, I’d be a lot more fun to socialize with.  I tried to abandon my tenacity, but I just can't let it go. (I’d be pretty good for the debate team.)

Another quality I would change about myself is my focus. My mom says that I have terrible focus but I just like to think of myself as a great procrastinator.  I sat down about three times to write this blog up to this point. I work much more efficiently when I am in class and when I can actually lose "house points" for being off task. Surprisingly, I noticed that I pay a lot more attention to what is happening around me than to what is in front of me. My father says that he was exactly the same as me. He could not sit still. I would like to change this because if I was focusing on the task, I could have much more free time. Time management skills are very important to have. People nowadays have very busy schedules. Time management is an awfully important life skill.

My mother insists that I cannot control my temper sometime and I reply “It’s genetic!” Although, I must admit she has a point. My father has a very short fuse and I guess I get annoyed and relieve my stress the same way he does.  I know for a fact that people would not like to associate with me at all, if I have a short temper. I am really trying to fix this before it gets really bad. I can see that my brother is following my dad’s footsteps too. (IT’S GENETIC!)

At Health Central, studies have shown that angry men and women that have a high blood pressure have an increased risk of heart disease. Higher levels of stress equals to higher blood pressure levels which equal to higher risk of heart disease. I should change my habits, for other people’s sake, and for my own health.

Everyone has characteristics worth changing, but these traits make up who you are. Sometimes you can’t change yourself, no matter how hard you try because that is just who you are. Some people just have ‘that’ attitude and some people just have a different perspective on things. Nobody is perfect.  However that is what makes us unique.